Check in with yourself daily to stay balanced 🔍
Check up on yourself. We go through mini traumas every day that seem like nothing but if we ignore, will build up and form bigger and more painful trauma. Checking in on yourself on a regular basis allows us to adjust any tiny increments needed to change the way in which we are moving forward, ensuring we don't stray too far from where we feel comfortable. A 5 minute check in each day can help you to understand patterns you may have subconsciously created and avoid a blind breakdown later.
In this talk called ‘Find Belonging & Stay In Control’ I present an exercise that helped me do this called ‘the feeling diary’.
Acknowledge all emotional turmoil 😡😢😔
Because we can not see or physically feel emotional and mental stress its a lot easier for us to ignore what we've been through and carry on with busy life as usual. I have noticed friends and family including myself go through immensely trying emotional situations only to be straight back to work the next day. If that works for you, great! But mostly it ends with frustration that work is not getting completed fast enough/things aren't as they usually are, or sometimes with illness. It’s like the emotional struggle been completely forgotten.
Just like a 12 hour shift exhausts our brain or body, emotional turmoil, whether it be a break up lasting 3 months or a relative dying, takes a great deal of energy from us. It is important to acknowledge this and give ourselves recovery time where we can, and kick in the self care just as if we were caring for a friend.
Peoples reactions are not about you ❌
I tend to take things personally so this was a big one for me, but an absolute eye opener when you apply it to every day life. However badly someone responds to emotional confusion, you may have triggered the reaction but the way they are responding is a deeper reflection on how they feel about themselves, which will mirror how they deal with their situations. It doesn't mean they hate you, they just have a different way of dealing with things. Everyone is different and we cant expect people to respond the same as we would, so try not to take it personally.
Societal pressure is not real - don't give in to it 👩👩👧👦
People who post their whole life on Facebook are most likely unhappy or at least trying to prove something. People who post perfect bodies on instagram either don't eat or waste whole days posing for the right photo. If people marry or have kids before you, great for them! But we are all living a different journey, and just because its right for them right now doesn't mean you should feel sad or go out of your way to look for what they have at this time. Getting jealous is a waste of our golden energy! If someone has a life you want, use that energy to succeed in the way that you want for you. Follow your passions and fulfil your own goals, become your best self and the right person will appear in your life to support you in the way that you need, rather than finding someone to complete you when you are an incomplete version of yourself.